Sunday, November 2, 2008

Is She Pregnant, Or Just Sloppy?

I love how folks on the train are scared to look at one another.

We look at the promotional posters a million times over, look through the windows, stare at the floor, analyze somebody's sneakers, but we just won't look at one another. It's like an unwritten rule or something. So I'm on the train obeying the law earlier this week, being a space cadet when some chick's ass rudely brings me down to earth. You know I'm a face man, so I stretch my neck a bit to see who the ass belongs to. But before I even get to the face I notice this pouch just poking out of the girl's shirt.

The thing is, I couldn't figure out if she was pregnant, or sloppy. If she was preggers, I surely would have given her my seat. I mean, I would have waited a few minutes hoping somebody else gave it up first, but I would have given her my spot if necessary. I thought about just getting up and offering it to her just in case, but then again, why should I give up my seat cause this chick's Ballys membership expired? So like five minutes go by and nobody's budging, so I'm thinking this chick just likes to eat before going to bed a lot. The chick was also not wearing a jacket. I mean, she was holding it in her hand. I know we were indoors, but that jsut doesn't strike me ass preggers-ish.

The shape of her belly wasn't too prenant-like either. But what do me and a bunch of train commuters know? But here's what sealed the deal. There was a lady with a stroller right in front of her and she barely acknowleged it. Pregnant women, at least the ones who have accepted their conditions, just light up whenever they see babies. But this chick just glanced at it with a screw face and moved on. I'm thinking this chick is expecting nothing but food. Mind you she was standing up. Imagine how her joint would have looked sitting down. Damn it! I hope she was just sloppy.


Naked With Socks On said...
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Naked With Socks On said...

if u dont want to give up your seat just go to sleep.. or close your eyes and wish her away. That's what I heard some people do...

as for the eye contact on train.. i actually heard that the technical definition of invasion of personal space in a crowded space is actually eye contact for longer than 6 seconds. Like if you're in a train that's packed leaning against someone and it's cool as long as you don't lock eyes for too long. so a chick could call sexual harassment for 6 seconds of eye contact

Marvelous Mo said...

LOL....I'm infamous for reading the ads and being a "space cadet" like nobody else. Men are scary though...the ones on the train.

I look at the eye contact thing as someone studying me to snatch my purse or to catch a feel... or to try to flirt with me. I see a cutie on the train once a month and the other guys look like they got hit by a mack truck, twice!

That chick was probably fat. Her problem area is her waist. She probably eats a shit load of buttered rolls from the corner store and grape quarter warters for it to be that big.

LOL at this post though.

Farrah said...


One day this lady got up and was like "you wanna sit" and I was like "sure". I'm thinking she must be getting off the next stop. When the next stop came she was still standing there (in front of me). I actually got off the train before her and gave her back the seat she gave me.

Now I'm thinking...Did she think I was prego!

I guess that's the ying and the yang, got to sit ...but need to do crunches! LOL

Rob said...

dude u are the WORST. I got two kids and live in NYC, thats why i hated for wifey to take the train while she was pregnant- folks like you.

The NWSO talking about pretend that you are asleep.

You're probably the type that when you see a chick with a stroller, you speed up or slow down so you dont have to be the one to offer to help her up the stairs. SMH