Monday, February 9, 2009
You "my family's not from here" people will surely appreciate this, especially Haitians.
I always tell people, there's literally a pre and post-Wyclef Haiti in the U.S. I can't stand that bloodclot Jafaikan accent of his, but at the end of the day the man wore the Haitian flag as a freaking cape at the American Music Awards...Or was it the Grammys. Forget Jean-Bertrand Aristide or Michele Pierre-Louis, Clef is our prime minister. See, before Clef Haitians used to keep their nationality on the low. Those who don't rep the flag usually get claimed anyway. Haitians are especially over the top with the draft. The second your name easily translates into french, you're one of us.
I grew up thinking all types of people were Haitian...like Big Daddy Kane. Come to find out his real name is Antonio Hardy...Not so much. To this day my brother says Ralph Tresvant is Haitian (well, he is from Boston) and you done know we claim Sydney Poitier, but he's actually bahamian. But here's the punchline. Not too long ago, I went to get a cut and my barber was babbling about Will Smith and Danny Glover being haitian. Listen, I'm an unapologetic Will Smith stan. I even have a separate Will Smith, Spike Lee and Eddie Murphy DVD section at the crib. But there's no way Will is Haitian. I appreciate everything Danny Glover has done for Haiti, but dude is American.
The funny thing is they don't always claim my ass. I usually get mistaken for being Trini or Jamaican. The OGs always know, though. They just run up on me and start speaking creole. This dude came up to me one time and started telling me all about how LL Cool J is Haitian. Another Haitian Smith? Usher is apparently one of us, but I don't claim him. Not until I hear it from the man himself. Here's a list of confirmed and alleged Haitians.
PS: Until I hear Usher acknowledge it with my own ears, his Haitian descent is just a rumor.
Confirmed: Wyclef Jean, Garcelle Beauvais, Dave from De La Soul, Chopper from Making The Band (Fack!), Pastor Troy, Jacki-O, Lela Rochon, Maxwell, W.E.B. Dubois, Jamie Hector, Tony Yayo, Gary Dourdan, DJ Whoo Kid, Mario Elie, Samuel Dalembert, etc.
Alleged Haitians: Rick Ross (Don't believe wikipedia. I asked him my damn self and he said no. YES!), Ralph Tresvant, Lauryn Hill, Usher, DJ Paul aka Paul Bauregard of Three Six Mafia, (I aksed him. He said no.) Sydney Poitier, Lil Wayne, Any Person With A French Sounding Name Or A First Name As A Last Name...