Thursday, May 14, 2009

Chery Love: If I Had My Own VH1 Show

I'm not gonna lie, I'm a sucker for those VH1 love shows. I religiously watched the first two seasons of Flavor Of Love, didn't miss a beat on Real Chance Of Love and really enjoyed For The Love Of Ray J.

Those of you who have been reading this blog know I've had a hard time meeting my match. Who knows, VH1 may be able to help. I'm no celebrity but I look at least better than Flavor Flav and I haven't been doing too bad for myself over the years, so I'd like to think I'd be able to attract a pretty decent stable. If anything, maybe they'd be excited about being seen on TV.

I'm a nobody, but you'd swear I was famous the way I'd be acting on the show. Here's the trick, I'd have to be involved in every single recruiting phase. We'd probably hit up Habana Outpost in Broolyn for some prospects. Some of these Love contestants be hurt so I'm not trying to waste my time or theirs for that matter. It's either that, or I eliminate roughly half the pack by the first episode. Once the cast is slimmed down to a few beauties, I probably wouldn't make cuts every episode. I'd take my time to get to know the girls.

I'm not big on PDA (Public Display Of Affection), so you wouldn't catch me tonguing down none of the chicks on camera. Flavor consulted with Big Rick, Real and Chance had each other and New York took advice from the wicked witch of Eastwick, so I'd have my own counsel comprised of some of my best buds, including Mark, Sam please say the Ed, Roni, my cousins Frantz and Ted and my 514 fam, Edcredible, Fred and Qwest, to help me make decision. You dunn know I'm tight with a bunch of Haitian vackquabonds, so there would probably be some  extra goons hangin' around whatever Mansion Viacom gets for us. Here's the twist. Once elimininated, the girls wouldn't be kicked out the house, just removed from the competition. They'd still get to come whenever we go out, they just wouldn't be in contention to be the last girl. But since my boys are around anyway, I'd tell him to holler at any of the ex contestants if they felt one of them. The good thing is, since I wouldn't kiss any of them, it's not like my boys would get sloppy seconds or anything. We were just talking. It ain't no fun if the homies can't have none, right? I wouldn't be surprised if one of them assholes tried to holla at one of the girls I'm liking either. 

I'm thinking I may wanna invite past contestants from other shows too. I saw Rabbit in the city a few times and she definitely lived up to my in-person expectations. I like me some Buckeey, but I don't do poultry, so I'd probably have to leave her on some Atlanta video set. Trust me, I run with a bunch of characters. There wouldn't be too much Sean Coonery, but there'd be jokes for days. Come to think about it, I probably wouldn't even be the real star of the show.

What about you, fellers? What would your show be like? Ladies, would you ever consider being a contestants for a person you like, or have say 20 men fight over you? Knowing myself, I'd probably give VH1 a headache then go crazy and quit the first day.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

I Don't Look Like Dwight Howard...Do I?

Dwight Howard...

People just love to tell me I look like so and so.

As I've mentioned before, I've been told I resemble everybody from Omar Epps to Mos Def. For a while, those two names always seemed to pop up. Lately, I've been told I look like Orlando Magic center, Dwight Howard. Not so much. It all started with the homie Toby a while back, maybe as far as two years ago. We all got pretty twisted and he mentioned that I looked light Dwight. At the time, I laughed it off and blamed it on the alcohol. I didn't hear it again until earlier this year. The homie Bonsu went as far as to say I should audition for his Lil' Penny, Lil' Dwight if you will.

Some Dude...

You know what the problem might be? I smile too damn much. I'm always showing teeth, all 31 of them to be exact. DH also smiles a lot so maybe that's it. Other than that, the only similarity between Dwight Howard and I, is superb leaping ability. Well, I can't dunk anymore, but I used to hurt the rim back in the day. Anyway, I was all ready to totally slam (no pun intended) the Dwight Howard resemblance until I stumbled on the following photo.

I still don't think he looks like me, but maybe the gummy smile is what makes people point to a resemblance. Now, I'm not mad. I hear the ladies are quite fond of Dwight, so it's not a bad look. I just think the comparison is off. Do I look like Dwight Howard? Absolutely not! But then again, maybe I'm buggin'. What do you guys think?

Monday, May 4, 2009

How Honest Are You With Yourself?

I look at myself in the mirror every morning.

But, sometimes, I wish I could see myself move and interact with other people just to see what people see. That way, I may be able to better understand the next person's point of view. I don't think any of us wanna be perceived as delusional, but I think we all go through our moments. I like to think I'm able to recognize my faults rather than constantly deny and point fingers, but every now and then, it's good to have friends who pulls no punches and show you the ugly truth. Let's not get it twisted. I don't listen to just anybody. I know who has my best interests at heart, who's malicious, and who's absolutely incapable of reading properly, so I value some opinions and take others with a grain of salt. 

As of late, I've been trying to take more responsability for anything negative I'm involved in. For instance, if someone starts an argument, it may still be my fault. Knowing the person, I should know if what I say has the potential to set them off, so I can either choose to speak or remain quiet accordingly.  

The best example I can give you is probably in romance. I've been writing this blog for well over a year and I'm still single. Now, I've been meeting women at a decent rate, gone out on a decent number of dates, but still struggle someone I click with. On the other hand, I've been meeting all types of crazy chicks. Now, I could just charge it to all women being crazy, but if I keep meeting the same type of women, who's fault is it, really? I hear girls complaining about how there's no good men out there. True, there's a lot of scum. But if you keep bumping into them, you may wanna look at yourself too.

I tell people all the time, my biggest flaw is that I embrace my flaws too much. Like, I'm absolutely comfortable the way I am and don't plan on changing for the most part. Chances are if you point out something negative about me, I'll agree with you, but I still go into denial about certain things like everybody else. It's not too bad when you know you're lying to yourself, but when you're oblivious to it, it's just not a good look. I honestly don't think there's a single person out there who is 100 percent honest with themselves. Some are just more than others. 
Public perception's just a bitch. Just remember one thing, the next time you aren't being honest with yourself, somebody's most likely seeing right through you.